.....writer.

If you were expecting me to type "that no one ever was" then you, sir or madam, are a nerd.

Oh yeah, happy annoying marijuana holiday.

Gotcha! I bet you were expecting some stupid, poorly written rant typed in all caps about how ol' NG isn't what it used to be. Well you are wrong, sir/madam! Invisible page view +1.

Have fun getting assraped by prison inmates, Rayvon.

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...fucking sucks.

It eludes me as to why anyone would glorify a place like that. People talk about being gangsta and "I'm from the streets" and shit like that. Why? I've been living in this place (for those who didn't notice the profile, The South Bronx) for 18 years and it is still filled with the worst people that I will ever meet. You ever seen a crackwhore in real life? I have. She was literally just skin and bones and she ate potato chips off of the floor of the local bodega. She's dead now. I can't even walk in the streets at night because gangsters would come out in droves, fighting amongst themselves like a group of rabid animals. They have shootouts in which the intended target is rarely hit because they have such shitty aim and they end up shooting some random kid. It is incredibly easy to get drugs over here because the police does nothing to stop smuggling and all that. Parenthood is usually a result of a mistake rather than planned. The other day I saw a pregnant woman with two teeth, fucked-up hair, and marks all over her arms. It sucks just thinking about what type of life that kid is going to live.

For those people who pretend to be "hard" and "gangsta" and all that can switch places with me. Because I would love nothing more than to get out of here. Most people around here are raised by the streets and the streets isn't a loving mother, it's a whore hellbent on ruining your life.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Death threats? Just post a comment in the box below, k? Thanks and have a nice day.

Uh............No idea what to write here. Methinks on trying to avoid the "Kevin Bacon" filter for as long as possible. Well, this guy right here *points to zen64* is pretty bored. I think that....FUCK!

Look at dat cinematography!

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Damnit, I wanted that name and now I find out that you've had it since '99 and have been inactive since. This will not stand, sir.THIS WILL NOT FUCKING STAND............SIR! You, me, school playground at 3:00 sharp! It's on like Donkey Kong, motherfucker! THAT NAME WILL BE MINE!

NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL A HEAD JOB!

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A couple of years ago, I went to visit my family in the Dominican Republic. There I was met with no hot water, rolling blackouts, and a shitload of mosquitos. Though it wasn't too bad, just imagine a suburban home sans cable, reliable electricity, and pure water. Every night, I would sit in a small bedroom and watch TV (that is, when I didn't get a chance to go anywhere). To my misfortune, Dominican television consisted of news stations that had the same news stories and the obligatory Hispanic singing show. All I had for entertainment was a stack of bootleg DVDs that I got from a guy who was also selling porn. I'll tell ya, seeing a porno DVD cover with your grandfather right beside you is a REALLY awkward feeling. Anyway I had a variety of movies to watch: Pan's Labyrinth (great movie), Live Free or Die Hard (meh movie), Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (cool but a bit boring), King of Beggars (a really obscure kung-fu movie, I highly recommend it) and IT. After watching Pan's Labyrinth for possibly the 67th time, I saw a DVD cover with a hand rising from the ground. It was a horror movie that is scary for a completely unintended reason. Unknowing of the horror that lies before me, I read the title:

"Subtreano"

I pop the disc into the DVD player and was met with what may be the worst movie that I have ever seen. From the get-go I knew that it wasn't going to be a masterpiece, I was hoping for some "so bad that it's good" material. But that is not what I got, my friends. I got a movie that was produced by Satan himself.

So the movie starts, and it becomes clear that the main characters of this cinematic abortion was the typical rag-tag group of teenagers. Teenagers with hair so ridiculous that Lady GaGa would blush, it's as if they were anime characters brought to life. But, oh, it doesn't end there, no, no. You see, the whole movies centers around a video game that is in a parking garage. Yes, the entire movie takes place in a fucking parking garage. At that point, I kept watching in a trance of sorts as if the movie was attempted to pull me in. Everything else after that was a blur. I awoke the next morning to be met with the same hand that has pulled me into this wretched film and as I saw the movie's dull menu, it is then that I realized that Subtreano has stolen my soul. It is too late for me now. A technicolor garage type hell awaits me. But I will leave these words of caution:

Please. Avoid this movie at all costs.

STAY AWAY!

STAY THE FUCK AWAY!!!!

SO HERE I AM, WALKING DOWN MY NEIGHBORHOOD, CHILLIN', MAXIN', ETC, ETC! THEN OUT OF THE FUCKING BLUE, I STEP IN WHAT MAY BE THE BIGGEST PILE OF DOG SHIT THAT I HAVE EVER SEEN! IT EVEN MADE A LOUD SQUISH WHEN I STEPPED ON IT! THIS IS BULLSHIT! IF YOU HAVE A DOG, IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO PICK UP IT'S GODDAMN POOP! I'M FUCKING TIRED OF HAVING TO PLAY HOPSCOTCH EVERY TIME I WALK DOWN THE STREET. WERE IT LEGAL, I WOULD BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THE NEGLIGENT DOG OWNER AND FORCE HIM TO PICK UP EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF DOG SHIT WITH HIS BARE HANDS! AAAHHHHH!

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Just leave it in my comment box, k? Thanks and have a great day! :D